All through the flight, I wasn’t really sure what I felt.  Looking out of the aeroplane’s window, down at the bright gridded lights, I couldn’t pinpoint my response.  Waiting in the airport at immigration, at the luggage carousel and at customs, I wasn’t sure.

Sitting in the car, looking out at the darkness and the dodgy driving, I couldn’t put a name to my emotion.  Driving past my old office, shrouded now in darkness, perhaps to conceal that all these years late, it still remains unfinished, did nothing but mix up the feelings yet further.

The heat, the dust, the kaleidoscope of beige, the endless rubble and building.  How do I respond to this, the most peculiar of returns?

I am back in Riyadh.

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